infidelity & affairs in counseling

Often, when an individual or couple comes for counseling, an affair has occurred, and the relationship is in crisis. An affair is a betrayal. The betrayed and the betrayer are affected, each in different ways. The good news is that healing can occur even though trust has been broken. Patience is required as the betrayed partner works through the loss of innocence and trust. Acceptance is needed that the relationship as it was is over; it cannot go back to before the affair. Yet the ripples of what was, in a positive sense, can be tapped into, and added to in a new and empowering way, while also dealing with the dynamics (they usually exist) that led to this moment. Looking to create a "good enough" relationship is a worthy goal. It's possible, but does take time and commitment. This can occur as part of general marital counseling or while explicitly dealing with the issue of the affair during this season in your life. My job is to help an individual or couple recover and navigate through this process.